Lotus - surviving life & remaining pure to urself

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Life

Just read elly blog, and she mentioned sth about why med student tend to write medics stuffs in their blog. Many bloggers use blog as diary online kinda thing - writing what you been through during the days, hence that's why I suppose.

Anyway, try diverting from medics subject, its American election today. I am leaning towards Kerry. Nonetheless, I am not surprise when Bush is declared a winner. Pre-election, although statistically speakin not much difference, you can see Bush has stronger influence. Brits called him "Dubya". I am not sure how he got this name.

Today I picked up my new passport with a new photo of the real me. The old passport bear the photo of "old" me. I know I have changed a lot since I come to the UK. I become more independant, a lot calmer, more mature and know how to groom myself. Masa high school dulu, I was known as someone who is "kecoh", tak tau nak match colour, gedik, mengada2x, highly insecure dan sebagainya. I was very aware with what people say. I always compare myself with other people, and always feel less than other people. I hate myself at that time. I remember in high school, I admire the ladylike, sweet looking manja girls - bak kata org melayu, jenis perempuan melayu terakhir yang boleh dibuat bini - and a lot of guys in my school "minat" them . I am faaar from that. There is one thing though, I am not sure whether I am still afraid of what people say or felt people will be judgement, I rarely mention from which high school I came from unless being asked repeatedly. I am not really the product my high school will be proud of.

I am glad I come to the UK, and discover the real me. I know that I have an adventurous nature, always want to try new things, have a passion of travelling and a lot braver than what I used to think of myself. I have broader mind and better communication skills. I accept criticism more readily and no longer "cry baby cry". I can handle myself in any sticky situation. I discover holiday romance which has blossomed to be the love of my life.

Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I have taken the offer to go to Monash Medical School in the land of Down Under.

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