Lotus - surviving life & remaining pure to urself

Friday, February 27, 2009

Politics

I purposely stopped reading anything regarding Malaysian politics. It fills me with dread.

People used to criticise Mahathir and nepotism etc, but at least I think he did maintain the political climate. I don't care what he did behind the closed door, but at least the politicians behaved.

Now? I accidentally watch the so-called debate or more politically correct to be put as a session to "celaka" and gaduh like budak-budak in dewan parlimen. It shocked me. Shame on all of you..I lost all my respects to them all, the damned politicians (pembangkang or pemerintah).

Don't critic if you cannot accept criticism from someone else.

p/s: I don't support anyone.I don't trust politicians.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Impatient patients

Well, I guess we all have our own fair share of rude patients, however nice one can be.

Today has been a particularly busy day. Ward round in the morning, gastro clinic in the afternoon and I have to nip in in-between to supervise ETT,answering constant bleep from house officers and wards and doing tertiary referrals. I cut short my lunch break and had to review someone in CCU come done to clinic. The clinic was running late and with all the last minutes add-on patients we had. I think I did pretty well juggling all these while being unwell with tonsillitis at the same time.

I had to answer a call from a tertiary hospital in the middle of my consultation and this very impatient patient suddenly just flipped saying it was rude to answer a call and we all should dedicate our time to clinic...bla..bla.. Obviously as a doctor, I just eat the humble pie and apologise, saying I had to, as this is an important call (an intracerebral bleeder). Then she just left the room.

Obviously I don't take this personally, and professionally I booked her for another appointment.

Nonetheless, respect is a very important thing and if you are going to be rude and nasty to my staffs, please leave the room. I may look like "a softie", but you DON'T cross the line with me.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

My current obsession

Torvill and Dean. (and its not just because of Dancing on Ice is currently on).

My God. The more I read about it, watch the Bolero/Paso Doble and most of their dances in Olympics and International Competition, the more and more beautiful I saw their relationship is. The twinkles in their eyes, their spoken words, their chemistry is just fantastic. I kinda wish they marry each other.

Its like the bestest of friends and forever belong to each other. I do think Torvill is the love of Dean's life and vice versa, but its not the sort of relationship that end up in marriage.

And Christopher Dean is so cute! What a gentleman and he truly looked like an ice blonde prince!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

The new low

You have no idea how much I want to cry when I ask the house officer:

What do you think of pO2 of 6 kPa, normal pH, normal pCO2?

He said: I dunno, normal?

And he seriously has no idea of Type I & Type II respiratory failure. This, is beyond belief. I am VERY WORRIED.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

James Morrison

I just realised how beautiful the lyrics for most of James Morrison's songs.

Really awesome.

"Broken Strings" lyrics is definitely "something". (I just couldn't find a fitting word to it. Beautifully abstract and yet so concise?).

I also cannot get rid of The Saturdays' "Issues"; keeps playing its tune in my head.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Just awful

Today is an awful day.

Start off my morning by one of patients dying from carcinomatosis (pretty much deteriorated rapidly over the weekend) and ended up the day with an intracerebral bleeder and a surprise result of metastatic malignant melanoma from his bone biopsy (while all the while everyone has been thinking about sarcoma/plasmacytoma line).

Everyone knew what stage 4 malignant melanoma prognosis is like.

Its just zapped all my zest today.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Staying back this weekend

Decide to stay back this weekend to sort out life, paper works etc...

Literally spend hours trying to sort out study leaves (yup, more courses, hence more fulus terbang), future exam dates, annual leaves, which on-calls to swap..Not to mention forms filling, absence cover etc... Banyak betul. Everytime nak buat something, its planning, planning, planning. To book flights, ferry. Menyampah betul la. How I wish everything can be spontaneous!

Went out with 2 of my consultants and my previous F2 yesterday night for a drink. I think I manage to "socialise" our medical department a little bit. Its a bit sad that everyone sort of segregated in their "own community". I mean this place do have a potential to be a good place to work if everyone socialise a bit more, instead of segregated to Asian/Manx/outsiders?

As usual, our Valentine's Day is a delayed celebration. April? Barcelona? We shall see.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Doctor?

It makes me feel a bit sick today that people are using their "doctor" title (i.e not a medical degree doctor, but doctorate/PhD) to dissilusion our nursing staffs. Ok, fine. I knew how hard you work for that PhD degree, but please don't do that to "scare" hospital staffs.

Please.

Even I don't use my title outside my work. I would rather people not know what I do for a living. Its not because I am ashamed of it, but I find people attitude is different when you introduce yourself as a doctor.

Monday, February 09, 2009

Presentation

I am sure people are sick of me by now.

Another presentation for grand medical round tomorrow. Then ward work, then rush off to airport. Interview then flying back the next day.. Seriously, all these flights and boat rides is going to burn me/D/K out. During on-call handover tonight,D just couldn't stop slagging everyone off after he is forced to do the nights. Grumpy D!

I have done so many presentations and lately I just feel I want to step back a little.

Its kinda nice my current consultant complimented my presentation skills today. He said, "Very polished"; although I did went a bit uh..uh.. during Q & A sessions afterwards.

Well, teaching career? Get involved with uni? Hmmm, I probably should start to volunteer to tutoring the Liverpool medical school PBL group.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

change of heart

This last week and the next weeks has been and are going to be a real roller coaster of emotions for me.

I have been having a lot of thoughts, change of mind and heart of where my future career is heading.

I am a generalist, that I knew.

p/s: eh, ada pulak orang shooting drama depan rumah aku.