PMS

I know this come every months; my emotions are all over the place and my monthly bouts of migraine. I can go from hours of crying to laughing with my mates in a matter of minutes. Its crazy.

In the last 4 days, I have been through 3 sailings and 1 chartered flight. I am exhausted by these commuting. Tomorrow I am back to work - 2 more donkey days.

On a more cheerful note, I am just so happy with facebook & blogs! I can now keep in touch with my bros and sis at a more constant basis; something that I yearns for in the last few years. We are all at different places and stages of our life, either work-wise and uni-wise; we all grow up apart and how I wish we can be closer. I left home when I was 13 to go to a boarding school and hasn't really been properly back at home since then.

Another blergh day

Today, as usual, I am as inspired as my foot. Dunno how long this feeling will last, oh, well, near the end anyway. I dunno if I can take the daily bitching with my Oncology nurse; I have to seriously salute her patience. I can only do my part by looking after Oncology/Haemato-Oncology patients as best and as well as I can. God bless R-CHOP regime.

Today also confirmed my role as a tool/hamba abdi to the team.

Do you know what cheer me up at work today (this is what I have been reduced to)? That same hilariously funny drug addict who continues his flirting shamelessly, asking to see my left hand in front of the whole of wards staffs and consultants, asking me to visit him in the psychiatry unit. Bloody hell, I do attract some stalkers.

My right thumb still sore from tapping this 80 ++ year old guy chest - the worst possible state; dementia, keep leaning to the side I am tapping, need to be hoisted to the bed and he keeps moving, jumped at least 3 times when I try to put the needle in. End up tapping 610ml straw coloured fluid from his left lung & no pneumothorax, phew!!I am not surprised to see how bent the needle is when I took it out.

Why is weekend so short? I missed my weekend with my dearest. This weekend menu, sushi!

Static

Too many things happening right now..I am just not in any mood to be chatty about it. I guess these too shall pass.

Work, as usual, blergh..... I picked up a near-missed case of contained ruptured spleen at 3 am in the morning(double-whammy with being on warfarin and has prosthetic valve). And the spleen is out, people,IT IS OUT. I saw my first leptospirosis. I mean,yucks,I can't believe how many long-tails (rats is a bad word on Isle of Man) live on this island; ye la kan, takkan nak terjun Irish Sea kot. Apparently them living on someone's garden is common....

That drug addict with a memory of a fish is hitting on me again today; already forgot he did the same yesterday.He cheered me up...hahahahaha, and by the end of the conversation he divorced me and said I should go back to high school. It must be the boredom that he actually looked forward to be admitted to Drug and Alcohol Unit.Asking me on daily basis,"What this pretty doctor doing here, why do you want to be a doctor and end up with are you sure you are not in school?". He certainly cracked me up.

I should probably hang out with my ulcerative colitis patients. OMG, social life sucks.D is so cranky all day today.

Jo is leaving to Texas for good; I am sooo gonna missed her.

Beachy Head tragedy

This is one of the saddest story I ever read. It makes you wonder, is life is ever fair?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1191129/The-smile-parents-live-The-heart-breaking-story-Beachy-Head-tragedy.html

Somehow it reminded me about a case I did encounter a couple of years back; it is not similar, but it makes me think what a broken heart can do to oneself. What do you do when the light goes out?

This young girl was brought the local casualty where I work. Found by police, still partially alive, hanging from a rope. She was comatose when she arrived. Heart still beats.My senior took over, and as I flipped through her medical notes, I remember feeling - "this is a girl who really determined to die no matter what we do, and whatever happened to her previous life, her heart is already shatterred to million pieces".

This is one of my many reasons why I cannot do mental health.